Scared to ever let your guard down and feel something beyond the fear. You remember the wonderful memories of the pleasure you shared with Orion Jones, but that was so long ago. So much has happened, horrible things take up the space between you and he.
But there's a longing.
When you two are forced together again. You want him, and that's terrifying. How could you ever want anyone ever again? Not after what happened. You're tainted, diary, unworthy of love. Feeling pleasure in any form would be wrong.
Your lips remember though, the taste and feel of Orion.
Would it be so bad to feel again? To not cower in the shadows, as life passes you by. Would it be so bad to love again? All while the world is burning up around you both.